Continuing this long story.
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Posted:Jan 27, 2016 1:48 pm
Last Updated:Feb 20, 2016 3:55 pm
9403 Views
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Well I am back. They total out my car and that really was a disappointment. This jerks insurance company is being very generous though. They will reimburse us for the value of the car plus the diminished amount to the value of the car. So Wayne is out looking for one to replace it. He is also going to use his car to purchase a Mercedes sedan. We both had little Mercedes (both convertibles) so we need a car that will carry friends, luggage and golf clubs. NOW BACK TO THE STORY Steve worked hard and I was working also. He got in some kind of trouble with a website that was devoted to 214 porches and rebuilding them. I never knew exactly what happened but he said he was though with that business. He decided he wanted to take old golf carts and rebuild them spec for customers. He said he could do that in the garage at home also. We still were filming for our own enjoyment. He found a guy that was picking up used EZGO carts from Pebble Beach and hauling them down to southern California and selling them to different places. So I financed the first load and he bought four of them. He started his own website, which I won't mention here. He started getting lots of orders and I forked over some more money so he could rebuild them. He did a bang up job of those and the money started to roll in. He had a big station wagon at the time and got trailer he hitched to the back of that to pick up the used ones and deliver the finished product. About that time we decided that he needed a brick and motar business and we found a good location in Huntington Beach. He also was introduced to a Vietminese gentleman that was a retired machanic for a large golf cart company and we hired him to help. One morning I got ready for work and I was walking down the hall and all of sudden when down like a rock with the worse pain I have ever had. I called my old boss (OBGYN) and he ordered me some pain medication. Steve rushed home but remember I we didn't have any medical insurance. It was 2005 and I was 63. At first I thought I had broken my hip but I could walk so I figured it was a sciatica problem. The pain shot from my back down thought my hip and down my leg to my foot. I had abdomical surgery back in 1970 and that was peanuts compared to this pain. The medication my boss sent me didn't even touch it. When I looked back on this time later I realized I had never filed for unemployment or disability. I just told my new boss I had to quit. I couldn't think and Steve was so worried about me he never told me I should. I don't know that he ever thought of it. That was big mistake. I had no income and I just went to bed for six months. I would get up in the night and try to sleep in the big chair in the living room or the couch. Steve would wake up when I wanted to get up and help me out there but I knew he had to some sleep so he could work and I would tell him to go back to bed. He fixed me breakfast in the morninmg but could eat much, he came home at noon and made me lunch that I tried to eat and he cooked dinner. He called me 20 times a day to check up on me and was loving and caring caretaker. I lost about 20 pounds during time and I was so sleep depraved and depressed. Finally I decided I had to cash in more stock and just go to a pain doctor. I found a lady physician that was in pain management. She ordered an MRI (expensive) that showed I had two lumbar disc that slipped and were pinching the sciatic nerve. She did a series of epidurals that didn't help at all. Then she put me on morphine patches and finally I got some relief. She said I needed surgery but knew I didn't have insurance. I also never thought I should file for my Social Security. What a dummy I was but I just could think straight. I was going to wait until I was 65 and got that and Medicare. So I just had depend on the Morphine and I was feeling so much better. I was starting to gain back the weight I had lost. I had gone down to 87 pounds and it took a long time to get back to 115. Now I could cook and run the house while he worked. I couldn't drive and couldn't walk long distances. Steve went to every doctors visit with me. He didn't just drive me he went in with me while I was with the doctor. He had to put the patches on my back shoulder. I was getting closer to 65 and I was researching Orthopedic surgeons from home. I had decided on one that was highly recommended but I still had to wait. Steve's business was going well and he would take me to golf cart parades and I would ride with him in one he had built. We even started filming again but not that often. OK, thinking about those times made me wonder if I hadn't been chonically depressed and should had seen a shrink? I need to answer some messages now and hopefully I can write more this week. Again I thank you, that follow this blog, for your patience with me. My love to you all.
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I am back from vacation
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Posted:Jan 20, 2016 12:41 pm
Last Updated:Jan 23, 2016 8:54 am
8170 Views
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We returned from out two month vacation on Nov. 16th but I have been so busy since we arrived home. While on vacation my Ipad died and I had no telephone servic. I was able to come onto AdultFriendFinder but could only view my messages. I could respond to them and did do that for a few but I didn't want to spend my vacation answering lovely messages. When I arrived home I had over 300. I tried responding from the bottom but AdultFriendFinder doesn't allow that. You can only respond to ten at a time. Just yesterday I finally caught up. I truly try to respond to every message I get. There are a very few that are nasty or saying I shouldn't be on the site, because I am not available and we are not swingers. I delete those. But for the most part I am blessed by the men and woman that write me such gracious and kind message. Well, it's time to add to this saga of my life. The site we were posting on just was so much fun and successful. Earlier in my life I had met a woman that posted one picture a day on her own site. Her husband and ran the site and she was making over a million dollars a year. Her name was Janie and some of you might remember her site. I don't know that web address anymore and don't know if it is still up. I had met her at a swing party with my second husband and kept in contact with her for years. When I went onto Southern Charms I told her about it. She said I should consider coming on her site. I told her I was much too busy , working and filming. She kept writing to me and begging me to post. I guess I was pretty naive about the internet at that time. About all I knew was how to post my sets and watch the money roll in. Steve thought it was a good idea if we just used our sets on both sites. I had been on SC for about seven months but then sent a set to Janie's husband and he put them up one day and the next day I couldn't access SC. I called them and they told me I had posted on another site and the broke a carnal rule with them. I was crushed. So for a couple of months I posted on Janie's and the money was better than with SC. One day I got a letter from her husband saying that he wanted to film a set with Steve and I. He also want me to engage in anal sex. Both of those things were no no's for us. Janie posted a glamorous picture every day so I just didn't understand that request. I had always been devoted to making my picture sensous and passionate. We did do some sets as a couple but that was making love and not just having sex. I tried posting on a couple of other sites that Steve found but they didn't pay the same and didn't have the traffic as SC and Janie's did. Not really worth our time. I worked and Steve worked so the filming slowed down but we still played around with it kind of regularly. Steve was still working in El Segundo but he wasn't happy there. One night he came home and said he had quit. I was in shock and concerned because I didn't have medical insurance and we were covered by the company he worked for. The Cobra on it was over 600 a month. Steve said he had an idea for a business of his own and he could work it out of the garage. Steve was a wonderful mechanic and he wanted to rebuild and sell parts for 214 Porches. I was kind of dubious about it but I wanted him to be happy with his work and profitable. I didn't have any idea how this would work out. I was working and making enough to pay the bills until this "took off". He went onto several sites where owners hung out and hawked his talents. There was a large club of owner nearby that started bringing over there cars for repairs. Steve was never lazy but he had never run a business before. So I was writing emails, collecting and pulling some stock out to fund this. He brought in a decent amount of money but nothing like he was making as a salesman. I WILL CONTINUE THIS ON SATURDAY. I am a little bummed right now. On Friday I drove down to meet my husband for dinner. I always park my car far away from other cars. It's a 2008 Mercedes SL500. So I did that but during dinner they came to ask if I had a Lexus or a Mercedes. Some jerk hit my car and shoved it into a Lexus SUV and then took the rear end of it off and drove another 100 yards and hit a Hondo and then drove off. Before we got out their an eyewitness said he drove around three times and then parked in at a different restaurant. Some people made him stay in his car until the cops came. They arrested him for leaving the scene. I won't know until tomorrow what the damage is to my "baby". She was show room perfect. So my mind is rather preoccupied with that.
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THE FILMING REACHES A FENZY
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Posted:Sep 17, 2015 12:26 pm
Last Updated:Jan 14, 2016 11:28 am
8947 Views
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Filming became a big part of our relationship. We got much better at it as time went on. I would buy "props" and my imagination ran wild with senarios we could do. The camera had a remote on it with a long cord and a timer. So we started working together in the picture. Steve would click the remote with his foot or keep it behind his back. I would throw out the pictures I didn't like and we enjoyed the challenge of doing more and more. One of the gals in the "Loving couple" chat room sent me a private messagie telling me that she posted on a site called "Southern Charms" and that I should take a look at it. She also told me she was making some good cump change doing it. That sparked an interest in me. I went there and saw that 600 ladies had there own site there. I looked it over for a couple of days and saw that the ladies posted pictures that people could view for free and then that men bought in to view the more erotic pictures. There were a lot of BBW's on the site but very few older women like myself. I thought I would like to give it a try. I talked it over with Steve and explained to him and we both decided that our pictures were better and more clever than most on there. So I signed up with the handle Sexanna60 and we went to work. It was no different that what we were doing and we had about 20 sets to start with. The first day I was on there I got messages from the site that 112 men had bought in at 12.99 and I got half of that. I was so excited to tell Steve. Now we really put our heads together and started working hard. We did the free pictures and the member pictures. We did videos for free and for pay. We wanted to get far ahead of game and stored sets so we were never behind. The more you posted the more members signed up. I didn't put any contact information because I didn't want to worry about answering a lot of messages. That didn't seem to hurt me. I didn't want men telling me how kinky I should be. We knew our pictures were more glamorous than most on the site and I vowed to keep it that way. I was an admirer of lady's like Ava Gardner, Grace Kelly, Rita Hayworth, etc. I went to thrift shops and bought ball gowns. Never went into "Vicky" ever. I wanted things that no one else had. I bought alot of lingery at different sex shops. I bought so much that most gave me a healthy discount. The first month I was on the site my site went to number one and I made over 2 grand that month. That paid for the props and clothes and left alot over for us. Now we were filming most every night. I was still on AdultFriendFinder and used alot of the picture there. I had the number one profile on AdultFriendFinder off and on. I alway had talked to the Vice President of AdultFriendFinder when I had a problem. I got so many messages from men that wanted to get together with me and so many of them were younger. I was still in the So Cal room from time to time and women in there were screaming to get the boy toys out of there. I called AdultFriendFinder and asked if they would build a Mature Chat Room. They said no problem. So that is how that got started and it was a lovely room to chat in. The first year a lot of younger men came into the room and caused a lot of problems. The older men in the room really fought with them. One of the ladies in the room asked AdultFriendFinder to but a lock on the door and men under 50 could no longer get in. I didn't was kind of mad that she went behind my back and did that but it remains that way today. The room was built in 2002 so it is still going strong. My site on Southern Charms was sailing. After six months we were making gross between 3k and 4k a month. Steve was building more lighting fixtures and we were doing some great scenarios. We did the Sleezy Boss/Secretary, the Plumber/Housewife and probably our best and best received one was Drive in movie circa 1950's. I had my Dad's old Buick and Steve put a blue light on the hood so it look like a movie coming in the windshield. He had white lights on both sides of the car that shown in on us. I had to dress him like a 50's guy and I wore a plaid skirt and short sleeve sweather on top. We sat like we were looking at the movie for a few shots. Then I motioned to him to leave like he was going to snack shop. While he gone I adjust the kleenes in my bra (not that I needed it but some girls did in the 50's) When he came back he had pop corn and a big coke. What I didn't know is that he had a bottle of rum that he poured in the coke. After sharing that and watching the movie he slipped his hand around my shoulder and moved closer. I removed his hand but he started kissing me and I progessed to taking unhooking my bra with one hand. He had practiced that for hours before we started this senario. Anyway it moved to the back seat. Of course he had to set the lighting up for that. This was the part for the members. We had a great time in the back seat and I was nude by then. The last picture was a spent condom on the consul. If I can sometime I would shrink it down and post it in here. I think you will get a kick out of it. OK THIS IS THE LAST ONE BEFORE WE LEAVE. I WON'T BE ABLE TO POST ANY MORE. BY THE TIME I GET BACK I HOPE MANY OF YOU WILL HAVE READ THIS FROM THE BEGINING. I PUT A LOT OF HOURS INTO IT AND I DON'T JUST WANT TO BE TALKING TO MYSELF. LOL THIS IS THE LONGEST VACATION WE HAVE EVER TAKEN. I THINK IT'S A LITTLE SCARY FLYING AROUND EUROPE AT THIS TIME. I WILL BE CHECKING OUT THE MUSLIMS ON THE PLANES AND TRAINS. I HOPE PUNTUN DOESN'T START A WAR WHILE WE ARE OVER THERE. I LOVE VISITING MY GIRLS IN SWEDEN BUT SWEDEN IS IN TURMOIL WITH ALL THE REFUGEES COMING IN THERE. THEY ARE CAUSING HAVOC IN THAT COUNTRY. I AM SORRY THE WORLD IS IN SUCH A MESS. PEOPLE SHOULD MAKE LOVE AND NOT WAR. RELIGIONS DAMN PORNOGRAPHY AND SITES LIKE THIS BUT IF RELIGIONS COULD GET ALONG THE WORLD WOULD BE IN BETTER SHAPE. THAT'S MY TAKE ON IT AND I AM STICKING TO IT. GOOD BYE FOR AWHILE. I LOOK FORWARD TO RETURNING.
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MARRIAGE NUMBER THREE
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Posted:Sep 15, 2015 12:49 pm
Last Updated:Jan 16, 2016 1:12 pm
8585 Views
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When we did film in the evening we always shut the shades and shutters. Didn't want the neighbors to see the living room, bedroom or where ever to be all lit up in different colors. Usually Steve took down the lights in the morning and moved the furniture back in place. He had also set up a portable pole for me to dance on in the afternoons for exercise and for pictures. My video was filmed on that. Anyway, one night I kept him up very late making love and he was too tired to clean up the evidence. When I got home from work there was a knock on the door and my neighbor across the street said his boy had kicked a soccer ball into my backyard and could he retrieve it. I said of course and let him in. I had totally forgot about our movie studio still being up. My neighbors eyes almost came out of his sockets. He didn't say a word and went past the pole and out my kitchen door and let himself out the side gate. Every after that I noticed that all the neighbors looked at me strange. LOL I am on AOL at this time. They had a great "stock" chatroom. I had a lot of stock and it was fun to chat in there. I had been in that room since 2000. It was a lovely group of people except when the "penny trader" would crash the room. LOL I don't know how many times or people reported them to AOL but it never did any good. The group was planning a greet and meet in Vegas in November, 2002. People were flying in from all over. I told Steve we could go to Vegas and get married and I could meet up with them all. He was excited about that. So we made plans to get married on November 2. It would be just Steve and I in one of those little Chapels. I decided on one and set up the wedding and limo to take us there. I told Steve to rent a tux because I was going to buy a wedding dress. I knew it would be unusal but I wanted it to be sort of perfect. So we drove up on the first and booked into Caeser's Palace. He booked a very nice room. It was one day early and I took him over to meet the chatters for lunch at the Flamingo. 400 plus had shone up and it was delightful to match handles with real people. I told them all we were getting married tomorrow and they were so happy for me. They knew what had happened in my past and they were delighted with Steve. They said they were going to be at the Mirage the next night and would be in the casino and for us to join them. The next day I got dressed first and went down to the casino of Caeser's to gamble a little. People kept coming up to me and wishing me happiness. Steve hadn't seen my dress because I told him to go and get some breakfast for himself. I was sitting at a machine and he came up and kissed the back of my neck and said " the limo is out there". I cashed out my quarters and put them in a bag I had taken down. Steve told me I looked like angel and I told him he had never been more handsome to me. The limo took us to the Chapel and we gave them out marriage license. They said we need to sit down for awhile because there was a wedding going on. When the couple came out , this is God's truth", she was in a dress and at least 7 months pregnant and he was in shorts and tatooed to the hilt. I should have taken a picture. We went in and I told him he had to listen to each word and promise me that. Of course, he did. We both had tears in our eyes and the minister said " those look like tears of joy", and we both said "yes" at the same time. It was over in a flash and then the photographer came in ....and we were married. The limo took us back to Caeser's and when Steve got me, he picked me up and carried me though the hotel and up the escalator and to the room. He slowly undressed me and I layed on the bed while he got undressed. I don't remember all the things he said to me but "the happiest man in the world" was one of them. I told him I was too. We made the most passionate love for a couple of hours and then I told him I was starving and we changed our clothes and went down to steak house in the hotel and had dinner. Then we drove over to the Flamingo and found all my friends. I think 200 of them gave us cards. There was a table reserved in the bar area for us with flowers on it and a wedding cake. We were both touched by their love and generosity. It was a wonderful reception. I am going to post two pictures because I can't find any of the rest of them from the wedding. I don't know what happened to them. I might have gotten rid of them by now. THIS WILL PROBABLY BE MY LAST POST UNTIL WE RETURN FROM OUR VACATION. I HOPE WHEN I RETURN THAT AdultFriendFinder HAS NOT MESSED WITH MY BLOG AND DELETED PAGES. I ALSO HOPE ALL OF YOU THAT ARE FOLLOWING MY BLOG AND NOT JUST HERE TO LOOK AT PICTURES...LIKE SO MANY ARE.. WILL COME BACK AND FOLLOW ME AGAIN. I HAVE SO MUCH MORE TO SHARE AND SOME OF IT ISN'T AS ROMANTIC AS THIS PIECE IS. MY LOVE TO YOU ALL AND MY DEEP APPRECIATION TO THOSE THAT LEAVE ME SUCH NICE MESSAGES. .....XX JUDY
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THE CONTINUING SAGA
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Posted:Sep 13, 2015 1:54 pm
Last Updated:Sep 16, 2015 1:09 pm
8041 Views
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I had never met a man that I didn't have the need to argue with about anything. He was a very right wing republican and i was (at that time of my life ) very liberal democrat. Yet we never argued politic. I remember only one time, and it really wasn't an arguement, that he drove my car and when I got in it the next morning I was subjected to Rush Limbaugh. I simply told him to change the channel if he drove my car again. LOL We were like teenagers together. He called me five times a day and I called him when I could be free at work. We did go out on dates at times. Some concert, dinner etc. Yet we enjoyed just being home. He taught me to love the Simpsons and I taught him to love Sinatra and other music that was important to me. I had mentioned that Steve loved to take pictures of me and I loved that he did. We started doing a lot of photography. He had a marvelous Minolta 8 pixel camera. Can you believe 8 pixel? That was big deal back then. He felt if he "lit" me the pictures would be even better. He built some lighting poles. I think I have a picture of that somewhere. I will have to search though. The we bought some colored lights and he mounted those. Steve was color blind so I had to tell him how to mix the lights for different colors and hues. Our routine was, that I would take a bath and come up with some kind of senario and music for the background. Then I would choose some lingerie (I had tons of that) and in the meantime he would set up the lighting and move furniture or whatever I had decided on. The music really put me in the mood and he would just shoot me like crazy. When I had stripped or whatever and was running out of poses, he would just say " give me a money" shot honey. Then he would pick me up and take me to bed and the fun would start. He almost always carried me to bed. The filming turned both of on like crazy. The next night we would go though the pictures and pick out the best ones. Steve would keep them as sets in his computer. Then we would shoot again. We found a site called Lovingcouple run by a couple in Florida. It was a great chat line where couple posted pictures. None were as professional as the ones Steven took. It was great fun though for me. I was good at chatting and he was good at posting the pictures. People usually posted on picture at a time but Steve would post two or three. I am not posting pictures here that were taken during those days but like I have said, I do post some from later years . One evening Steve came home from work and found me with stakes of papers and a calulator. He asked what I was doing and I told him I was getting my papers ready for my CPA because it was tax time. He told me he had never filed income tax before. I was kind of shock, even though I knew he had only been working odds jobs for six months out of the year and surfing the other six months, somewhere in the world. I told him that I would put his work papers together for the CPA and we would go together. So I made an appointment and off we went. I had used Jerry for years and when we walked in he was kind of curious about what was going on. I told him that Steve and I were living together and filing separately. We left the information with him and he said he would see us next week. The next week we had a later appointment with Jerry. We went in and sat down and when Jerry came in his opening statement was " you two need to get married because you both are getting killed this way". He then showed up what we had to come up with and what it would be like if we were married. Steve was grinning the entire time and I was very concerned. Jerry suggest that we file for an extension and think about this. All the way home Steve told me how much he loved me and that he wanted to marry me. I just listened and didn't have much to say. There was a holiday celebration at my daughters out in Temecula. I hadn't mentioned Steve to the and they had not met him and I didn't want them to meet him yet. I explained again why I couldn't take him with me. I saw that he was hurt but he said it was ok. I had met his mother and liked her and she liked me. I did mention to him before I left that my car had been acting up but I needed to drive out there. He looked concerned but just told me to be careful and he would look at it when I got home. I made it out there and had a nice time with my two grandsons and grand . When I got in the car to leave I called Steve and told him I was on my way home. When I turned the corner from my daughters home I saw him standing beside his car. I stopped and got out and asked him what he was doing there and how had he even found where she lived. He told me he had followed me out there and stayed out of my site on the freeway. He wanted to make sure I was ok and the car was running alright. Now he was going to follow me home. I was so touched that he cared about me so much to do that. I had been there for four hours and he just sat in his car waiting for me. When we got home I asked him if he still wanted to marry me and he left the room. I thought he had changed his mind or was crying. He came out right away and asked me to sit down. Then he got on his knees and pulled out a ring and said " I beg you to marry me, please, please say yes". I took a big gulp and tears rolled down my cheeks and blurted out " I love you Steven and yes I will marry you". I asked him how he had saved the money for a ring and he told me told me he had just saved some of the money I gave him each week and had bought it several months ago. TO BE CONTINUED LOL I HOPE I AM ABLE TO WRITE ANOTHER SEGMENT BEFORE I LEAVE. THE DAYS ARE GOING FAST AND I STILL HAVEN'T PACKED MY BIG BAG YET. IF I GET TO BUSY YOU WON'T HEAR FROM ME UNTIL NOVEMBER. THOUGH. I WILL TRY TO DO ONE MORE THOUGH THIS WEEK. AS ALWAYS, MY LOVE TO ALL OF YOU THAT ARE READING MY STORY.
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A twist to the story
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Posted:Sep 11, 2015 2:33 pm
Last Updated:Jan 31, 2016 9:59 am
7936 Views
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Steve followed me to work, like he had before. I only had to go half as far as he did to work. He looked so handsome dressed for his first day. I never felt as cared for by any man that I felt from him. I think he was excited to have gotten this job in sales. He was so low key that I wonderful what kind of salesman he would be. Mostly, in the past, he had worked at MGM in lighting but was just a grip. All day long, at work, I wonder what was going to be the best solution to our arrangement. One of my big worries was that I didn't want my to know I was living with a man closer to their age than mine. They had not liked that I married a much older man and now I was going to invite a much younger man into my life. I got home, about 3pm that day and I decided to fix a nice dinner with candle light and wine. Steve wasn't a drinker but I thought he would join me with a glass of wine. He got off about five but had to drive home in rush hour traffic on the 405. He called and said he wouldn't be there until 7pm and I planned the meal accordingly. I loved to cook and I loved my kitchen so it was kind of fun to prepare a meal. I had eaten out so many nights with dates. I never cooked for any other man since Larry had died. Steve was elated when he got to my house, even though he had been stuck in traffic. He picked me up and swung me around and then said " what's cooking goreous". He always called me "goreous" and I loved that. I lead him to the table and he saw the candles and wine glasses and the bottle on ice. He picked up the cork remover and gently removed it and poured both of a glass. He said he wanted to toast to a beautiful woman and the meal I had prepared. We did that and kissed and I went to the kitchen to put our plates on the table. I had cooked a prime rib roast. Baked potatoes. A crisp green salad and fresh cook brocoli. Steve was in awe. I don't think anyone had cooked for him for a long time. He though it was the best meal he had ever had. I liked that he enjoyed it and it's alway nice to cook for someone that is apprecitive. I mentioned towards the end of the dinner that we needed to have a serious talk. I had made a chocolat cake for dessert and we took that to the couch for our talk. He had a look that told me he was nervous about what I was going to say. I kissed him sweetly and just said that I had though about this for sometime now and I wanted him to move in with me. His eyes lit up and tears rolled down his face. I also told him, that since he was working now, he needed to help me with expenses. He didn't have to pay rent but I need some help. I didn't tell him anything about all the monies and stock that my father had left me. I kept all of that in a separate accounts and told him about my concerns with my . He took me in his arms and picked me up off the couch and carried me to bed. That night felt like we made love, instead of just having great sex. Don't get me wrong, the sex was always magnificent .....yet the feeling of loving him made it so much better. I didn't tell him I loved him, although he told me did constantly. He woke me up with a cup of coffee, in time for me to go to work. He had to leave that day before me but when I took the cup to the kitchen, he had cleaned all the dishes from the night before and cleared the table. No man had ever done that for me either. I arrived at my office and was grinning like a monkey. My secretary said " what's up sexy woman". i told her that Steve was going to be living with me. She said " I want to meet this man. Why don't you two come to dinner next weekend". I said that would be wonderful but I didn't want her grilling him. LOL She said " I won't, you cougar you". Steve had grabbed his clothes from his mother's home during the week. I had washed and ironned a lot of it for him. I hung it in the guest room closet. I set up the master bath for him because it had a shower and I used the other bathroom, which I always had because it had a tub. We made love every night. He was inventive and I had a great imagination as to how I could please him. He was vehement that I get off as many times as I wanted before he would even consider entering me or let me go down on him. He was vocal and so was I. We were the perfect sexual match in bed or on the couch, dinning room table, washing machine or any other place we could come together. He worshipped my clit and pussy. I worshipped his cock and balls and his hardness. I have always been so turned on by a man that could get a hard on by just kissing me. I think that in kind of primal. That Friday when he came home he had signed his paycheck and put it on the kitchen counter. I told him that wasn't necessary and was I suppose to give him an allowance? LOL He laughed and said maybe that would be just fine. I told him, I don't want to be your mother and he said how about being my wife. I stopped him with a kiss and told him not to go there with me. But every Friday it was the same thing. I packed him lunch every day and we went to the grocery store together always I didn't even see other men when I was in public. Before I had always scoped out men but now they were invisible to me. We were always holding hands and only had eyes for each other. People use to stop us and tell us what a wonderful couple we were. This big hunk with a tiny woman with silver hair. No one ever though I was his mother....thank God. LOL I TRULY WILL TRY TO WRITE A COUPLE OF MORE SEGMENTS BEFORE WE LEAVE ON THE 19TH. WE ARE HEADED FOR EUROPE (ITALY,SPAIN AND FRANCE) THEN TO SWEDEN TO VISIT MY GIRLS THAT HELPED ME RAISE MY . THEY AREN'T "GIRLS" ANYMORE AND IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE THAT ONE OF THEM IS 60 ALREADY. THEY ARE MY BEST FRIENDS IN THE WORLD AND LIKE YOUNGER SISTER TO ME. WHEN WE LEAVE SWEDEN WE FLY DOWN TO BARCELONA FOR A FEW DAYS AND THEN JUMP ON A CRUISE SHIP FOR 16 DAYS TO HOUSTON AND FLY HOME FROM THEIR ON NOVEMBER 15TH. SO I WILL BE ABSENT FROM MY BLOG AND MY PICTURES FOR ALMOST TWO MONTHS. I AM HOPING I WILL BE ABLE TO ANSWER MESSAGES. NOT SURE BUT HOPE I CAN. MY LOVE TO ALL OF YOU THAT ARE READING THIS "BOOK". I TRULY APPRECIATE IT.
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Things really start to heat up.
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Posted:Sep 6, 2015 11:29 am
Last Updated:Jan 17, 2016 10:35 pm
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That wasn't the end of the times I spent with Steve. He was out job hunting. He wasn't dumb bell by any stretch of the imagination. He was well read, even though he had not gone to college. He was a master mechanic also. I had my father's Buick and my Mercedes. Dad's car needed some work and Steve had done that for me. He was also now driving an older Porsche that he had restored. I think he had sold the VW but don't remember. We did go on dates at times but most of our relationship was sexual. I have always been a highly sexual woman and he was so very satisfying. He also took some really good pictures of me that I used on my profile here to attract men. The business man had come back to town and we had planned to take a long weekend away and play golf. Steve came over the night before I was going to meet up with "my date". Steve asked me if he could see me again that weekend. I told him no, because I was going away with Dave for the whole weekend. He looked at me like I had stabbed him in his heart and he started to cry and tell me that he couldn't stand the thought of me spending a weekend with another man. I told him that this had been planned for a month. He left in tears and something tugged at my heart but I needed to pack and get ready for the weekend. I was relieved that he didn't call me that night. I really didn't know what I would tell him that I already hadn't told him. Dave picked me up the next day and we took off for San Diego. We had several tee times and different courses nearby. We had a nice day at the beach and lovely dinner that night and when we went to bed and began to have sex....something in my mind snapped and I wishes he were more like Steve. There was feeling of detachment with Dave. I knew he liked me but I had no idea how much that was. The next day when we went golfing I was getting things of of my bag and in each compartment was a note from Steve. Not just notes but letters. I had no idea when he put them there but I knew it was recently. He poured his heart out in these letters. I stuffed them all in my golf purse before Dave saw them. I will never understand what happened to me when I got a chance to read them all in the bathroom when we got back to the hotel. All of a sudden I couldn't wait to get home. I did sneak away and call Steve and tell him I was miserable down there. That I missed him and we would talk seriously when I returned. Somehow I got though the weekend but when Dave was driving me home I told him I couldn't see him again. I didn't see a future with him and I needed a man that I was number one with. He was rather taken back but he didn't put a fight about it. Again, I saw Steve's car parked around the corner and when he rang the door bell, it was me that jumped into his arms. He said " I have exciting news for you". Between kissing him he told me he had found a good paying job and he was starting tomorrow. That night was majic. My guard was down now and even though I didn't tell him, I loved him, I knew I was falling in love. Steve had asled me many times to marry him and I had laughed. I had no intention of marrying him at all but my feelings for him were stronger than I had ever had for a man. Part of me knew I was crazy but the other part was not worrying about that just yet. WELL I HAVE A LOT OF MESSAGES TO ANSWER NOW AND I WILL WRITE ANOTHER SEGMENT TOMORROW. MY SINCERE THANKS TO ALL OFF YOU WHO ARE FOLLOWING THIS STORY
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Tring to remain focused
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Posted:Sep 5, 2015 10:55 am
Last Updated:Sep 5, 2015 8:28 pm
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Well I went on dating. It was more like interviewing I guess. Seems there was always something that made me decide that I didn't want to pursue a relationship. They were all nice guys but I needed to find one that filled the bill. I was interested in the International business man. He was intelligent, good looking and a good lover. Only problem was that he traveled constantly. The boy toy was calling all the time. I didn't answer most of the time but did have a few conversations with him. One night, like most nights, I had a date with a guy that I couldn't wait to end. I went to the restroom and called Steve and ask him to meet me around 10pm. When this other fellow took me home at night I notice that Steve was parked around the corner. The minute I was in the house the door bell rang and I openned it and he swooped me off the ground into his arms and carried me into the house. My heart nearly jumped out of my chest. He lips were on my the entire time and he carried me down the hall to my bed. We had sex all night long. I was starved for the climaxes I had and he got off, over and over again. I fell asleep in his arms and woke up late for work. I got myself, kind of put together and he followed me to work. He blocked cars so I didn't get stuck in traffic and blew me kisses every time he did it. When I got to work my secretary couldn't stop starring at me. I asked he what the problem was and she said I had my blouse on, wrong side too. LOL She said I must have had a very interesting night. I told her what I had done and that this guy was 20 years my junior and she said "you go girl". I told her it was just a fling but more fun than just going to dinner with someone. I truly was dating men that were closer to my age. I surely didn't want and older man but I most definitely didn't want a boy/ either. But a few weeks later I did ask him down. He lived in Malibu and that was 75 miles away from Newport Beach but he broke laws getting down to see me. I was always the same thing although I always remembered to set my alarm after that last fiasco. This went on for a couple of months. One night I noticed he had brought some clothes and put them in the guest room closet. That alarmed me. In the morning I told him, he was not moving in with me and to take his clothes home. He said " what do you want of me?". I said, "just what we have". He grabbed me and said he was in love with me. I told him I wasn't in love with him and we would talk about this later. He called constantly but I didn't answer the phone. One Saturday he showed up at the door, unannouded. I openned the door and told him that wasn't acceptable. He begged me to let him in and finally I did. We sat on the couch and talked. I told him I was interested in someone else and that we had a lot of fun but I wasn't going to be living with a man that was just one year older than my oldest . I also wasn't interested in someone that was working a job that wouldn't be able to take over my expenses. I reminded him that I had gone though hell with a man that was 23 years my senior and I wasn't going to do unreasonable age differences again. I wanted someone that knew the music I loved and the same kind of movies and all the things I was comfortable with. I told him to leave because I had a date and I wasn't sure I wanted to see him again. Tears came to his eyes and he said " I will find a way to have you". I kissed him goodbye and wished him my best. I forgot to mention that everytime he had been with me, he would leave me a beautiful note, somewhere in the house that I could find it. That will be important in the next segment.
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My first night with the boy toy
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Posted:Sep 3, 2015 1:33 pm
Last Updated:Jun 11, 2016 2:51 pm
6562 Views
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I forgot to mention that it was winter and I had drug out my futon mattress to the living room and placed it in front of my fireplace. I would sleep out there sometimes with a roaring fire to keep me warm. So when he came in I didn't know if that struck him as an invitation. I did explain it to him during our conversation. I also told him I had cancelled my date. He suggested that he would go and bring us some Chinesse food. He did that and we continued talking for a couple of hours. I do think I did most of the talking, since I was bringing him up to date on what my life had been like. He shared that he had never been married and had no . He had lived with a couple of women and had quite a few other girlfriends from time to time. He was easy to talk too and I had the feeling that he was compassionate and understanding. If I got choked up he would talk my hand and tell me to take a deep breath. He did ask me, at one point, if I cared to share a joint with him. I had not smoked marijuana much in my life. Probably just a couple of times. It always had a sexual affect on me. I did date a man that use to bring me cookies that were laced with MJ and they drove me crazy sexual. I invited him to join me in the patio to share the joint. I had a lovely firepit surrounded by large, overstuffed chairs. He told me he had smoked marijuana most of his life, daily. I was anxious to see how it affected him. Shortly I told him I wanted to go into my room and change my clothes. He said he would put some wood in my fireplace while I did that. I told him I had a cord of it next to the garage. As I have said, I was rather cocky towards men I just wanted to try out sexually but had no interest in a permanent relationship. So I put on something rather erotic because I wanted to see the affect it had on him. Well, I did see a bit of shock in his face but he grabbed me and kissed me so deeply that I swayed. We sat of the couch, in front of the mattress and made out for what seemed like hours. I was so turned on that I invited him to lay down with me in front of the fire. The fireplace had nothing to do with the fire that was between my legs. He slowly undressed me, kissing and carressing me at the same time. He had removed his clothes also and he was so muscular and desireable. He kissed every inch of my body and told me that I had the most succulant nipples he had ever seen. When he got between my legs, he lifted his head and said he surely wouldn't have to search for my clit and immediately went to it. I truly don't think I have climaxed that many times since I was with TONY. This man, took me over and over and when he mounted me I was in a place I had not been in for a long time. When it was over, I told he he had to go. I didn't want my neighbors to wake up to VW with surf board on the top. I thanked him for a wonderful day and night. He asked when he could see me again and I said .....never. He looked hurt, shocked and a little angry. He said to me " you go out with your "fancy Dans" and when you get home call me and I will come down and treat you like you need to be treated". I laughed and said "when hell freezes over". He left in a huff and I went to bed to get a couple of hours of sleep before I had to get up and go to work. I woke up, wet and frustrated.... I WILL WRITE MORE TOMORROW.
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OK I think I got caught up so I will continue now
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Posted:Aug 31, 2015 2:31 pm
Last Updated:Jan 30, 2016 11:56 am
7368 Views
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After loosing Larry, Mom and Dad, all in 2001, I was at a very low point in my life. Even though I had them at home, until the very end and knowig they would be leaving me soon, I just wasn't prepared for it. Having been a nurse, I figured I had already grieved, but that wasn't the case. I was needy for so many things. Mostly, I was sexually frustrated. I needed a strong man in my life. I was still on AdultFriendFinder but with all the funerals, taking care of the mess Larry left me with and cleaning that up with some of the money Dad left me. I still had some good stock left from first marriage also and now I was able to return to work full time. So I didn't have any finacial worries and that was a relief. I was still on AdultFriendFinder, Match and Plenty of Fist. I just was dating like a fool. My neighbors were hanging out of their window when Ferraris, Limos and every other kind of car came to pick me up. Like I said, I couldn't believe the calibur of men I was meeting. Not a bad one in the bunch. Since I had already been divorced and widowed, I was very picky though. I did meet a couple of much younger men that I decided to have sex with. I guess they were my fuck buddies for lack of a different term. I was able to call either one of them at any time of night and they were right there. I didn't really date them at all. I suppose, they used me and I used them. I spent a great deal of my time answering everyone that wrote to me. My funniest email came from and 19 year old that said "you are hot and I think we have a lot in common". I wrote back and said " I am not Mrs Robinson". He wrote back and said " who is that". End of that coummunication. LOL I could probably write another book about some of the men I dated. One in particular was one of the brothers that founded Best Buy. They had sold it for a fortune. He was good looking, about 10 years my junior and filthy rich. He had a beautiful home in Newport Beach and another one in Vegas. He was sexually awesome and treated me like a princess. I was dating him and no one else for four month. One night we went to THE ARCHES in Newport Beach (it's no long there). We had a lovely dinner with a special bottle of wine. Then he moved closer in the booth towards me and brought a ring , that almost blinded me, and said he wanted to marry me but I had to promise him one thing. I asked him what that was and he said " I need a wife that will swing with me". Tears came to my eyes and I told him I could do that. I had fallen in love with him but I just didn't want to share my man and I didn't want to be shared. I was looking for the last love of my life and wanted to devote myself to that man. We parted, never to see each other again, and I started dating again. There had been another extremely wealthy man I had dated once before him. He owned 6 of the colleges at the Belair Ritz Carlton. They were all worth millions each. He asked me to drive up and he would prepare dinner for me in his cottage. I had been in alot of beautiful homes in my life but his was breathtaking. He was handsome, polished and very intelligent. He called over to the Ritz and had our dinner sent over. We ate in the dinning room at a table that would sit 30. Massive room. We talked, I played his Concern Grand Piano for him. We drank wine from his cellar and we ended up in his bedroom. I generally didn't have sex on the first date but I was pretty tipsy and it just happend. While we were having sex he asked if he could call over to the Ritz and have a couple of his gentlemen friends join us. I think I pushed him off of me....I don't quite remember But I know I got dressed very quickly and ran out of his front door and drove home. Having dated a lot of men who were wealthy, I came to the conclusion that they could buy anything they wanted but they all were kind of kinky. I was looking for love and not looking to be someone's mistress, swinger nor all the other things they might be wanting of. I am not sure if I mentioned that when I wrote that long profile, I had put my email address right in the middle of it. I didn't read the fine print about not giving out your email. I guess AdultFriendFinder didn't catch. So I was getting alot of email on top of all the messages. I answered almost every email or message I received. It was like my parttime job. I did think that if a man took the time to write or just compliment, he deserved an answer. I still do that, even though I am not here to date anymore. One day I received a very special, long, email from a man. Beautifully written and thought provoking. I did check his profile but he wasn't a paying member so there wasn't much to go on, except that he was 39 and I was going to be 59 in a few months. He did say he lived in Malibu, which was about 75 miles away. I skipped over his email but kept it. He was so long and needed to respond in same even if I was not looking for a man that was one year older than my oldest . At the time, I was dating an international bussiness man that was out of the country a lot. He was handsome, a few years younger, viril and an advid golfer. We had gone on some weekend golf dates but he would fly off and be gone for a couple of week. I continued to have dinner dates with other men though. One evening I opened that letter from the guy in Malibu and wrote him back a long email but didn't try to show him that I had any interest in him. The next day, I got a short email from him and he told me it took him hours to write the first one because he could only type with one finger. LOL He gave me his phone number and asked if I could call him sometime?. For some reason, I wrote it down and then deleted his email withough answering. A few weeks later I came across his phone number and felt bad I hadn't answered his email. I had some time and thought I would just call him. He answered and this deep baritone voice, stuck me right away. I like men with deep voices. LOL Well, I have no idea about what we talked about but I do know we talked for about two hours. I probably talked more about myself to him than he did to me. Not sure, but I am a talker. I know I told him I was dating constantly and that I was interested in one particular man. I probably said something about his age also. I was pretty cocky at that time in my life because I had so many men to pick from. But it was a nice conversation or I wouldn't have told him he could call me back sometime. I never called him after that but he started calling me on a regular basis. I did find out that primarily, he was a "surfer" and that he worked jobs for six months so that he could take off and go to Hawaii or Australia or wherever the big waves were. He was also funny and made me laugh alot. He kept asking me out but I declined. About a month went by and one day he called and said he needed to bring a friend to John Wayne Airport (close to where I lived). He asked if he could just stop by and meet me. He said he could be there by 2pm. I told him that would be fine but that I did have a date that night and he could only stay for an hour or so. Since I was meeting a surfer, I didn't change my clothes and was wearing my favorite old sweat suit that was frayed and had hole in it. I had never even seen a picture of him. So I was kind of looking out the front window to see what I had gotten myself into. All of sudden this old VW Bug pulls up with a surf board on top of it. I ran into the kitchen and drank a shot of tequila right out of the bottle. Then I heard the door bell ring and I slowly opened the door and this surfer boy was a goreous, muscular, piercing blued eyee man. I think I rocked back my shoes. I invited him in, got him a beer and we sat on the couched and talked. To regress, I had told him to bring me some mariquana and his camera. I didn't have any new pictures and he did tell me on the phone that he had worked at MGM several times, as a grip and that he had a real good camera and if I need pictures he could come and take some of me. He already knew a lot about me and how I was widowed and what I went though over the last two marriages. He was very sympathic, genuinely, and so easy to talk too. The conversation went back and forth but I was watching the clock. I kept reminding him I had a date that night but we just kept talk. I actually excused myself, went to the bedroom, called and broke that date. I WILL CONTINUE THIS IN A DAY OR SO. THESE PICTURES ARE OF WHAT i WAS WEARING WHEN I MET HIM
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I think this was my last segment that got deleted. I will post it and then write a new one today.
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Posted:Aug 31, 2015 11:46 am
Last Updated:Mar 28, 2024 4:15 am
6435 Views
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Eventually I broke down and bawled my eyes out. What I thought had been the love of my life. The man that treated me like a Queen in the beginning. Then had put me though hell but I survived him. Now it was just Dad and I. There still were issues I had to address, concern Larry. What do with the shop he had that was filled to the brim with machinery and a zillion odds and ends. I had a sale of his big machines and anything else people might have wanted. A lot people showed up and were in awe of the machines he had built for himself but they would never be able to figure them out. I did sell a couple of his big machine, he had bought. As I remember it was about 18K in total sales. A few weeks later one of the men that Larry was friends with and that he had done a lot of work for, came to me and said he would gather about ten men and pull in some big containers and clean out the shop. I can't express how grateful I was to him. When Larry was getting so much weaker they had begged him to let them clean out the shop but he though a fit and it never got done. Oh to regress, I did have a memorial service for him and several people did lovely eulogies about him. I had his ashes and I contacted one of his friends that had a P-51. I asked him to take Larry up for his last ride and shatter him in the Pacific. He was kind enough to do that for me. My house was quiet now and Juanita was still there for Dad and I. I was able to go back to work and make the money to cover my experiences. Dad was getting weaker and harder to handle. He was constantly talking about Mom and how much he missed her. I just told him that I needed him too but it didn't matter. Lifting him to the toilet and getting him into the shower took both Juanita and I hours of back bending work. Dad was alway apologetic but I told him he took such good care of me that it was my turn to care for him. One day Dad mentioned he would like to go into a rest home in Palos Verdes. I didn't pay much attention to that but he continued to talk about it. I called my brothers and asked for their advice. They said it was my call. They both lived in Texas and hadn't been any help at all with Mother and Larry. I was on AdultFriendFinder at this time. I had sat down one night and written a profile that was 18 pages long. I tried to write what I could give a man and what I need from him. I had a couple of glamour shots that Larry had taken of me to post. I had no idea what would happen. I set up my profile and was overwhelmed with messages. I would spend hours answering each one. I also was on Match.com and getting a ton of messages there. So I started dating. I was surprised with the calibur of men I met. I was in an interviewing mode myself. I would communical though messaging, Sometimes, exchanging emails and sometimes . I did start meeting men for dinners. Most of the time I would find out that they had in college, or living with them, ect, ect. At the end of the dinner I would tell them that they were wonderful gentlemen but that I wasn't interested and wish them the best with there new searches. I think they appreciated I was honest. I didn't want to waste my times getting called or receiving additional emails from them. For the most part that worked. Dad knew I was dating alot but didn't really know I was on a site like AdultFriendFinder or even Match. I think it was June of 2001 when I finally relented and moved day to the facility in Palos Verde. Most every day I wouid spend my lunch break visiting him and sometimes at night also. He was very comfortable there but it was extremely expensive. Dad had money and I paid for that from his account. I let Juanita go but that darling would go and visit him and never asked to be paid for that. She loved him too. Now I was free to make some choices of men I would like to meet sexually. There were a few that I had as friends with benefits. I was so very needy and they rocked my socks off. One was close by and he was an administrator of schools in a particular area. He was bright and funny and a great lover. He use to bring me chocolate chip cookies, laced with Marajuna. They made me insatiable. He was looking for a lady to swing with and he knew I didn't want anything to do with the swing lifestyle. So we just got together as friends. I continued dated like a crazy womam. Dad had lots of visitor from his church that was nearby. That made him happy. Sometimes when I went to visit I would roll him into the rect room and play the piano for him and he would sing along. Many times the room filled up with other people that were more ambutory. Many of them would sing along. The nurse were thrilled when I did that and told me that some of patients in there that sang had rarely even talked. I told the nurses the "music is the the universal language". Dad was always in a great mood and seemed to be fine there. He was still talk about wanting to be with Mom but I would always change the subject. I continued dating and screwing arouind. It was nice to be back to work also. I had missed all my friends there and they had missed me. I had been working part time in the past and deligated alot of my work to others. Now I could handle it all and didn't have to be working off the computer at home. My job now was to find another love in my life. One day in October, a Saturday, I had gone up and had a wonderful visit with Dad. I told the nurses that I had a blind date with a United pilot. They were so excited for me and told me to have a real good time. So I got home and took a bath and was ready to meet this gentleman. He arrived and we sat in the living room and we were just chatting. The phone rang and it was a nurse and she said that Dad was slipping and I needed to get up there right away. I was crying and I told Terry what had happen. He demanded that I let him drive me up there. I didn't think I could drive because I was shaking. I relented and he drove me up there. I told him to wait in the lobby and I went to Dad's room and he had passed. I don't think I have ever delt with such saddness. I was hysterical but had to call my brother and my . It's all a blur to me. I did go to the lobby and tell Terry that my Dad was gone. I told him he didn't have to wait and I could take a cab home. He hugged me and said "don't be silly, I will drive you". I guess an hour passed and I just sat with my Daddy. He looked so peaceful and had a slight smile on his face. Guess he met up with Mom. I am not religious but I like to think that happened. Jerry drove me home. He wanted to take me for dinner but I just couldn't think of eating at that time. I had a thousand things running in my brain. It was late when we got home and he walked me to the door and hugged me. Then he said " is anyone going to be with you tonight"? I said no. Then he said "if you have a spare bedroom, could I stay with you, I don't think you should be alone tonight". I finally said he could stay and thanked him from the bottom of my heart. He was so kind and helpful and considerate. He tucked me in bed and told me to get some rest. He then went to the guest bedroom. Of course, I cried myself to sleep but when I awoke the next morning he was gone. Just about the time I woke up, the door bell rang and a beautiful arrangement of flowers were on the door step. They were from Terry with a beautiful note of condolence. It had to have been "the date from hell". LOL I never saw him again but for years I got a card from him on the date of our date. I often think of him and hope some special lady found him. Now I had alot of things to do again. Loosing three people, especially my Daddy....I was not in a good place. My thanks to all of you that read this blog. I can't assure you that it will get more sexual very soon.
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I posted this before and it was my last segment but AdultFriendFinder deleted it so I need to repost it.
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Posted:Aug 30, 2015 8:25 pm
Last Updated:Feb 20, 2016 12:55 pm
6089 Views
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I WILL ADD MORE PICTURES AND A COUPLE OF NEW SEGMENTS THIS WEEK..PROMISE I need to fast forward over the next five years. I don't think I could ever explain to people what I went though with Larry. I need to try, so that you will understand where I was at when it finally ended. He had no respect for me or for medicine or doctors. He continued to smoke constantly and was on oxygen 24/7. He would drag himself to work every day. He did have a good friend that had a welding business in the complex where Larry had his shop. I asked John to please keep an eye on him and he did (babysat him every day). I was still working also and Dad had Juanita there to care for him. Dad was just in a wheel chair because of his legs. During this time I still had alot of stock (solid company's) but I didn't want to get into that. Larry wasn't making much money and I could only work part time. Somehow, we had enough to get by. Larry had some good inventions that where in a large catalog company. The orders came in but he wasn't strong enough to fill them all the time. One night, when we went to bed, I finally fell asleep. It was difficult because of his snoring and gasping for breath. Suddenly, I woke up and he wasn't making a sound. I shook him and there was no response. Could detect a pulse on him. I jumped up and called 911. In a few minutes a fire truck, ambulance and police were there. Immediately there was 12 people in the bedroom and they were doing CPR, shooting him up with God knows what and he was put in the ambulance and rushed to the hospital. I got dressed and got there in five minutes. When I went into the ER they were still working on him. He was transferred to Intensive care and put on a ventilator. Three days later he was wide awake and gestering with him hands that he wanted the ventilator out. I sat with him and told him that he had been brought back from death and needed to relax and they would remove it when they felt he could breath on his own. That didn't help and the next day they did remove it. In five days they sent him home. The doctors schedule him for a sleep evaluation. I took him for that and the result were that he stopped breathing 106 times during the night. Now I was terrified and my sleep was constantly interrupted by his Sleep Apnea. I don't know how long he was home before he was driving to work again. I know it wasn't over a week. He wasn't a person you could slow down. All of his friend's begged him to take it easy but it was like talking to a "wall". My timeline for all he put me though has been on the back burner for a long time. I just know that I thought I would loose my mind at times. One night he couldn't sleep. He was out in the garage constantly on the machine that measures his oxygen levels. Finally he came to bed and once again I had to call 911. Again the room was filled with EMT's, firemen and police. The fire captain came to me and ask if he had a DNR in place and I said he wouldn't sign one. The captain put his arm around me and told me how sorry he was for me. They rushed him the the hospital and this time his heart rate was 262. If you don't know how someone could survive that........you didn't know him. They were IVing him, shooting him directly in the heart and don't know what else. Somehow they got him back to normal. He had a wonderful cardiologist in the hospital. Young and very handsome and he told me it was very important that Larry get a pacemaker. I told him that if something happened to Larry I wanted his heart. The doctor said you don't want that and I said he keeps coming back from the dead and he must have the most remarkable heart. Well, Larry was totally against having a pacemaker. It took three days of arguing with him until he relented. Then when he came home and eventually went back to work he would open is shirt and tell everyone to see he had it and it was curing all his problems. He continued to smoke and his pulmonary guy was totally disgusted with him. He told me he wanted to drop him as a patient. I had to beg him to stay on board because if a physician drops you, you can loose your Medicare. The next time he went out on me and I went to the phone and I actually paused for a moment. I don't like myself for this but I just didn't want to make that call. Of course, I did but it still bothers me that I though that. I did figure that if I didn't call in a timely manner and he died, I might be suspect. This time he went back on the ventilator and it was the same struggle to get off. When he did the doctors told me to put him in a convalcent home. Now how did they think I could convince him of that. I just told them to take him when they discharged him from the hospital. So they did. Larry told me he would stay there if I brought his car to the parking lot a leave it for him. The man drove me nuts. Anyway, he had been there for a week and I went to visit him and he wasn't in his room. I went to the desk and asked them where he was? They said he was in his room but they were going to discharged him for smoking in the room. How he got cigarettes I will never know. He had told me the day before that he needed a new battery for his phone. So knowing him, as I did, I figured he went to Office Max to get one. So I drove over there and asked if he had come in. I could never explain the looks on the employees faces. They told him me he came in dressed in a hospital gown but had just drove off with the battery. It might have been funny to some but to me it was disgusting. I drove home and there he was. By this time, it was a love/hate relationship for me. Moving along, I had to put him in another convalescent home and again he smoked in his room and they kicked him out. At home again he complained about his back hurting him. He had actually made an appointment with and Ortho Doctors. He actually let me drive him over. That physician said he had a couple of slipped discs and gave him a prescription that Larry had filled. I really felt sorry that he was suffering from that on top of not being able to breath. Yet it happened again and he went out on me. I looked at the prescription and it was for morphine. I told the EMT's and they were horrified that a doctor would give morphine to someone in his condition. I just have had his license's revoked. Went he came home I had already contacted hospice and they told me there was only one more facility that would take him. So I had him moved over there by ambulance and I followed them. When I got there the ambulance driver said he was begging them to stop so he could buy some cigarettes. Would it never stop???????? But the next day, somehow, he got a cigarette and was caught smoking in his room. Hospice call me and said that there was no other place to put him except in "lock down". The next morning I went to visit him and he was wheeling himself around the corridors. I gently told him that I couldn't take him home and that he was going to be in a room that only I could visit. I said I had to take Dad for a doctors appointment and I would be back in a couple of hours. That is what I did and when I came back I walked into his room and he was unresponsive. He was bubbling from his mouth but no pulse. I stood, looking at him and I put my ear to his nose and there was no breathing. I stood up and said "God damn't you died". I said it because he always said "God Damnit". He said it constantly and I could think of anything else to say. I went to the desk and told them he was dead. I will always know that , that man, could never be locked up. I think he just gave up. I could have gone on and on about all the things he did that put me in awe and the things that almost destroyed me. If there is a heaven, I feel sorry for all the havoc he would be causing....................................
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